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Hi my name is Keith. I’m not too sure how this works, this is my first time on a forum. I’m not too big with social media platforms, my main source of social media is through YouTube. I find it kind of difficult to find people to communicate on a deep level with because over the past several years my life has changed dramatically. Not to go to far back but back in 2020 at the beginning of the year my mother transitioned on the 21st of January. Before transitioning my mother stayed with my sister in Georgia. My mother had cancer and was not doing too well so my family called me to come out to Georgia. At the time I was living in New Mexico. So I flew out to Georgia two days later to be by her side since we all knew she didn’t have too long. My mother was under hospice Care at my sister’s place. When I got to my sister’s place and I seen my mother for the first time she was laying on the bed and she looked up at me with eyes wide open and noticed I was there and then she closed her eyes and laid back down. That was the only moment during the whole time I was there that I had seen her eyes opened. The remaining time I was there she was unconscious and just laying there. Family members and friends would come and go to visit with her as she lied there. During the times where it was just me there I would just talk to her about life. Even though she was unconscious and not responding to me I would just talk to her about everything. I talked about some of my deepest secrets and some of my insecurities. Over the next several days that I had spent with her and the times where it was just me and her I would just do that just talk to her. I would journal during that time as well and express my feelings about myself and about life. I knew during that time she was going to leave this place soon so I would tell her that my sisters and brother and I will be just fine and that where she’s going she would not feel any more pain just Joy and happiness. I was supposed to return back to New Mexico on the 21st of January so I got up that morning to get ready to go back home thinking to myself that I was glad to be going because I didn’t want to see her transition. Before I even headed out the house to leave to go to the airport I got notification that my flight was bumped and I would not be leaving that day. At first I was kind of mad because I wanted to leave but after a while I thought to myself hey I’ll just leave tomorrow. That day family and friends all came over to be by my mom’s side and it was just another day. Sometime during that evening while family and friends were there talking and laughing and just having a good time around my mom the lights went out and it was pitch black in the room. My sister went to the fuse box to switch the lights back on. Afterwards she went to where my mom was laying in the bed and realized she was gone. After she realized that the whole demeanor in the room changed. There was a lot of crying and yelling. During that time I didn’t know what to do so I just sat there I was in like some type of trance. After a while I got up and went over to the bed and held my mom’s hand as I kneel next to the bed. I didn’t know what to think or feel in that moment, I was in some type of trance. After a few moments I got up and went into my sister’s room and set on the ground and went into the silence. I sat there for some time in the dark not thinking of anything at all. After a while I finally got up and went back into the room where everybody was at and I noticed a difference in me. I can’t explain it, from that point on my life changed. The rest of that night was kind of like a blur for me I couldn’t really explain it but I had no emotions the only time I felt something is when somebody hugged me. It seemed like I felt their emotions but once they let go of me I went back to neutral. Over the next several months after I got back to New Mexico my life dramatically changed. That was the year that the world shut down because of covid, but for me in ways I can’t truly explain it it was the best year of my life even though my mom transitioned. My mind body and soul went through a huge shift. Over the next several years until now I’m still going through profound changes in my life. People around me have noticed the change as well and I have lost a lot of relationships. I’ve lost pretty much all of my belongings. It’s as if my life is turned upside down in the physical world. My interests and things have changed dramatically as well. I’ve noticed huge changes in my body mind and Spirit but not necessarily in the outside world as much. There’s a lot of other things that I have not mentioned but maybe if I get a chance to talk with other like-minded people it will be easier to communicate those things. Thank you!
Hey Keith,
My name is Sue. I am newly awakened, just over a year. I too have many questions and things to say and no one to talk to. It’s a lonely road right now but I’m staying the course. Do you have questions… or maybe you have some insight for me. Nice to meet you, Blessings, Sue.I can relate to the aftermath of your experience. This started from just over two years ago in a big way. Now that I look back the signs of this began much younger. I myself has also lost everything. I no longer work to maintain the tangible lifestyle I had previously. Belonging, family, friendships. No longer align with my values. I have been studying the meaning of it all. It’s painfully isolating, frustrating and exhausting. I’ve been praying for just one single person to connect with.
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