A Mountain Monk A Mountain Monk
A Mountain Monk Something in you already knows.

A Mountain Monk 
I always learn so much every time I meditate up on top of Cathedral Rock in Sedona. It is a great teacher to me. I imagine that Ramana Maharshi didn’t just worship Arunachala, the holy mountain where he lived, but that he too learned from it. It might be strange to say that a rock can teach us. But I cannot deny this for it is so.
I have a very powerful connection with Cathedral Rock. There are many sacred places in Sedona I could choose to spend time with. But Cathedral Rock has called me, probably not that different from Ramana being called from his home by the holy mountain Arunachala. I can’t really explain it. Perhaps everyone has a sacred place that calls them. They just may not have heard it yet.
Actually there is no place on earth that is not sacred. But some specific places seem to call to us with more force than others. I don’t know why this is.
The KoanOver five years ago, when I was first called to Sedona, I was given this koan: “The rocks and you are exactly the same. There is not an inch of difference between you.” Perhaps it’s not a coincidence that the name Peter means rock. But that’s not what this koan is about. If you are not familiar with the term koan, it is a Zen practice for awakening. It is a simple phrase Zen teachers give to their students like, “Show me your Original Face before your parents were born.” When this phrase sinks deeply into the student’s consciousness, it is like a seed deeply planted in fertile soil. Eventually this seed grows and blossoms into a beautiful and profound awakening. Unlike the seed of a plant, the seed of a koan continues blossoming as there is no end to awakening. It blossoms infinitely.
This koan was given to me by the rocks, specifically Cathedral Rock and Thunder Mountain. You could also say it was given to me by the infinite consciousness that all things emerge from. It is the same thing. This koan sunk deeply into my consciousness. And it continues to blossom every day manifesting in beautiful flowers of increasingly deep insight.
Tree PeopleFor the last month or so every time I pass one certain tree on my ascent up Cathedral Rock, out of the corner of my eye I very clearly see a person. I alway look and there is not a person, but that same tree. It’s strange that this would always happen the same way at the same spot with that same tree. Today I realized why. In my previous life, I didn’t just consider humans people. I considered trees, tree people, rocks, rock people, birds, bird people. That was my relationship with all that is. I had a great deal of respect and love for all that is. I didn’t see human people as better than tree people, rock people or bird people. There was an experience of Oneness. When I said, “All my ancestors.” there was nothing left out of that expression. My ancestors included trees, rocks, birds, the sun, the stars, the great mother earth herself. This was a few hundred years ago and today, in our sophisticated modern society, some people may consider this primitive. But I don’t consider it primitive at all. I consider it truth.
And what Cathedral Rock did was simply remind me of this, remind me of my old ways, remind me of truth that much of our modern, sophisticated society seems to have forgotten. This is what I mean when I say that Cathedral Rock is always teaching me.
But that wasn’t the only lesson I was to receive today. When I reached the top, I sat in meditation as I always do, welcoming and being welcomed by the sun, the rocks and the wind. Since it was a weekend, there were many people up there. Cathedral Rock is one of the most popular hiking destinations in Sedona. This is not the first time I wondered why I was called to such a popular place when there are far quieter and more remote places to meditate. Today Cathedral Rock showed me why.
Human people are generally a pretty noisy bunch. They love to talk and comment on whatever is going on. And this trait may be even more prominent when they are on vacation and they come upon such a beautiful place. I’ve gotten used to this, but I can’t say I enjoy it. And don’t forget, Cathedral Rock is a very holy place for me. What some people may experience entering a great cathedral, an ashram or a Zen monastery, I experience on Cathedral Rock. It is a very sacred space for me. And with all the noise going on, it’s sometimes a little hard to hear what the rocks have to tell me.
Today I learned that much of my reaction was due to traumas I experienced as a child. My father used to tell me that “humans are the number one bad animal”. He loved animals and all nature, but he didn’t feel the same about humans. He said that humans are the only species that kill each other and they kill other species just for fun. He spent a long time in the military during World War II. He began before the US was even involved. He saw a lot of death up close. Both my parents were alcoholic and there was a lot of violence in my home. I learned early on to be afraid of adult humans. And this fear and reason for fear was reinforced outside the home as well.
Sitting up on Cathedral Rock, I felt completely at one with the rock people, the tree people, the sky people, the sun people, the wind people, the bird people. I felt at home, at one and in love with all these people, with only one exception – the human people. This reflected my early childhood as well. I could sit out in the middle of the forest on a pitch black moonless night, listening to the sounds of the night animals, and feel completely safe and at home. In fact, I felt completely at one with everything in nature. I did this a lot because it was not always as safe in my house. In my house, there were humans. And they didn’t make me feel safe the way I felt in the forest. And here, up on Cathedral Rock, I was experiencing this again. I wasn’t afraid of the humans who were chattering away. But I was resisting them. I was not including them in the great circle of oneness that included everything else. This was a great and valuable teaching for me. That is why this popular, crowded place, filled with chattering humans, was the perfect place for my spiritual practice and education.
Little by little, I included the humans into this circle of oneness, this circle of unconditional love, this circle of truth. I realized that everything that I perceived, the rocks, trees, sun, wind were all simply expressions of this one, infinite, formless, un-manifested presence. I could feel this deeply throughout my entire being. And I was also none other than an expression of this infinite, eternal presence. So why leave humans out of this truth? Everything is an expression of this one timeless presence. And everything IS this one timeless presence. And that means all humans, just like these wonderful humans chattering away up here. And then I opened completely. I was no longer resisting. Rocks, trees, wind, birds, humans all one expression of the infinite and timeless presence. My heart exploded in love. It reached throughout all space and time. And then I saw the exquisite beauty of these humans. While I was resisting, I could not see it. This essential goodness was radiating from all of them. One young man climbed down a very steep part of the rock to retrieve plastic water bottles other hikers had thrown there. Another man was talking about working with autistic children and I could feel his love and compassion. Everywhere the flower of humanity was revealed to me. What I had perceived as annoying chattering showing a lack of respect for this sacred space, I now realized was instead pure love. It could no longer be hidden by my previous stored and repressed traumas.
For most of us, it is relatively easy to love nature and feel comfortable in nature, just as it is for me. Humans are more challenging. But humans are also nature and cannot be separate from nature. Humans are a bit of a paradox. On one hand they are the only species we know of who can fully awaken to their True Infinite Self. On the other hand few ever do. Although that is beginning to change. But, even at their most ignorant, they are pure expressions of the infinite and eternal presence that is the source and substance of all things. I guess sometimes I forget that. And, like a great teacher and loving mother, Cathedral Rock always seems to give me exactly what I need exactly when I need it.
I’m feeling that my next stop may be Times Square in New York. If I can sit in the middle of that bustling caldron of humanity and feel nothing but perfect peace and love, I think the lesson begun on top of Cathedral Rock will have truly manifested. It may take a little longer than an hour. I may have to give it a few days. Life gives us so many opportunities to practice, to learn, to grow. Whatever we need always arises as soon as we need it. The trick is paying attention. Throughout most of my life I missed most of these great gifts, almost all of them. I didn’t know how to pay attention. I didn’t even know I should. I lived in a dream world. Until I began meditating, I didn’t even know how to be quiet enough to pay attention. But that’s okay. That’s the course of a human life. We’re always moving, always evolving, always learning. Truth has never been kept from us. We’ve just spent a lot of time being distracted and not paying attention. When we begin paying attention, we begin to see our sacred place everywhere.


Most of us love rainbows. They are beautiful. And they also have much to teach us about life and truth. One of the reasons we love rainbows so much is because they are clearly so temporary. As soon as the sun sets, where is the rainbow? When there is less moisture in the air, where is the rainbow? Rainbows usually don’t even last for a full hour or even close to it. They appear like magic and disappear just as quickly. And this is why we love them. It’s a wonderful treat to see a rainbow because they are rare and very temporary. You better look while it’s there because it won’t be here for long.
And this temporariness is part of a rainbow’s great beauty. If a rainbow lasted for days or years, it would not have the same impact. We’d begin to take it for granted. “Oh, yes that old thing. It’s always there.” The short life of each rainbow is a big part of its appeal.
The temporariness of a rainbow points to a very important fundamental truth about all of life. It’s temporary. If you have grown children, you can remember and even have photographs of them when they were just born. They were so cute and tiny, usually weighing less than ten pounds. You could hold them in one hand. Imagine if their body remained that same size throughout their life. It would seem pretty strange when they were twenty and still weighed less than ten pounds. So the body of your child has been changing all the time. At one point they could neither walk nor talk. Now they may never seem to shut up. 🙂
Everything in life is changing. Your body will also not remain the way it is today. The lifespan of a rainbow may only be a few minutes. The lifespan of your body, including all its changes, may be eighty or ninety years. There is a difference between the lifespan of a rainbow and the lifespan of a human body. But both are impermanent. Both begin and end. It is only a matter of how long this takes.
There is something else very important about rainbows. They cannot exist without certain elements existing. If there is no sunlight, there is no rainbow. Rainbows don’t occur at night. If there is no moisture in the air, rainbows also can’t occur. Rainbows depend entirely on other things for their very existence, like sunlight and moisture in the atmosphere, among many other things. I think this is pretty clear.
We all understand this about rainbows, but we don’t really consider how much this is also true for ourselves. Just like a rainbow, there are many things that are absolutely necessary for our existence. Our body could not exist if our parents had never met for instance. And then of course there is air, water and food. It is obvious that this body could not last long without these essentials. Most of us don’t consider all the things that the very existence of this body depends on when we think of our body and ourselves as separate and independent. Just as a rainbow cannot be separate and independent from sunlight and moisture, we cannot be separate and independent from the many things that are necessary for our existence.
In Buddhism we call this the realization of non-self. Not only rainbows and bodies cannot exist separately and independently, but nothing can. The realization of non-self and the realization of impermanence are two of the universal truths that lead to awakening. These are known as two of the Three Seals. They are called Seals because they represent universal truths. The third of the Three Seals is Nirvana or the extinction of all concepts. Concepts, thoughts and language all divide the world up into separate and independent things. Since no separate and independent thing can actually exist, all concepts are fundamentally false. When all concepts are let go, we encounter the truth of life directly.
When we realize fully that a rainbow is impermanent, that it is changing all the time, even while we can still see it, and that it cannot exist independently and separately from all the other elements that are necessary for it to exist, then our concept of a rainbow dissolves. Only then can we truly see a rainbow for what it is, not separate from anything else in the universe. This is true seeing. This is the seeing of Nirvana. Each of these Three Seals (universal truths) we can realize from deeply observing a rainbow. We can actually learn this from deeply observing anything because everything contains the same universal truth. But observing a rainbow might be more fun, if you like that sort of thing. 🙂

You can learn a lot by watching ants. Like bees, they are the ultimate team players. Everything they do they do for the ant colony and the queen. No ant ever said, “This job is boring. I’m out of here. I’m going to start my own ant colony.” Instead of separate, independent, individual minds, they seem to have one mind. Everything they do, they do for the benefit of the whole colony. Everything they do is for the whole. Bees have a hive mind. Ants have a colony mind. Ants practice the Sangha Body perfectly.
To the human ego, this may sound horrible. “That sounds like slavery. Where is my individual freedom to discover and be who I really am.” By who I really am, the ego simply means a better version of the ego.
Living in a monastery as a Buddhist monk or nun is like putting a bunch of rocks into a can and shaking it vigorously. Most rocks begin with a number of sharp edges. You may know people who have sharp edges. These sharp edges protect the ego from the world and other people. The more sharp edges, the harder it is to get along with such people. The sharp edges are their resistance to life. Novice monks and nuns often enter the monastery with their own sharp edges. Living in a monastic environment is like shaking the can. Eventually those sharp edges are worn away by rubbing up against other rocks. Zen monastic traditions have thousands of years of practical experience removing those sharp edges. And this explains why Zen monasteries have lasted for thousands of years.
Back in the late 1960s and early 70s, there were thousands of communes all over the US. I was in one and had friends in dozens of other communes. Today only three that I know of from that time still exist. Despite our good intentions, the failure rate speaks for itself. And yet thousands of years later, many of the original monasteries still exist. What’s their secret?
It’s the rocks in the can. It’s removing those sharp edges. Monasteries have a central purpose that trumps the individual purpose. Back in the late 60s, we had some wonderful goals: peace, love, to change the world. But somehow the ego was still too strong. Those sharp edges may not have been visible, but they were still there under the long hair, peace signs and beads. We may not have been on “ego trips”, but the ego was still there undercover and still running the show.
We love to watch star athletes like Michael Jordan. He and others like him are an amazing testimony to what the physical body is capable of doing. But no star athlete can succeed without the team. Even in individual sports like tennis, competitive swimming or martial arts, the athlete cannot succeed without a great coach. The coach and the athlete are the team. When star athletes exhibit astounding abilities, we may not notice the team that makes this all possible. Our focus is riveted on the star player. And in individual sports, we never get to see the coach and all the behind the scenes work that makes this athlete so outstanding.
The ego would like to believe that it is all the effort and work of one person that makes this possible. The ego looks for separation everywhere and so it finds it, even if it’s not here. And the truth is, it never is. But that doesn’t stop the ego from finding it. The simple realization that no separate, independent self can exist is the greatest threat the ego faces, because that means that the ego doesn’t exist.
I answer many questions each day. I love doing this. But without the question, where is the answer? An answer needs a question to exist. And I learn just as much from these questions and answers as the one who asked the question. There is no separation anywhere. A teacher cannot exist without a student. A student cannot exist without a teacher. The teacher and the student are completely dependent on each other. The teacher and student “inter-are”, as Thich Nhat Hanh would say. If I think of myself as a separate, independent role of a teacher, then I have a big problem. The teacher is the student. The student is the teacher. No answers can appear without a question. The question and answer are one. The student and the teacher are one. To realize this fully is to live an effortless life, like flowing downstream in a river, there is no separation and no resistance anywhere.
Rubbing off those sharp edges simply makes the ego less dominant and makes it easier to get along with others. But it puts us solidly on the path of the realization that the ego never existed and that we have never been separate from the life we created those sharp edges to protect us from.
Everything in life is teaching us this. You only have to spend a little time watching ants to see.