N-lightenment

Something in you already knows.

A Mountain Monk

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A Mountain Monk
When I say I am a monk, people often ask me what kind of monk. Am I a Buddhist monk? A Zen monk? Am I affiliated with a certain monastery or lineage?
 
I suppose I should say I am a mountain monk. I learn from the mountains. The mountains are my teachers and my lineage. I have a Zen lineage also that goes back thousands of years all the way to Shakyamuni Buddha. But my main lineage is these mountains and it is far older.
 
I don’t only learn from these mountains. I learn from everything. The sun, the stars, the wind, the birds, the coyotes, the mountain lion, snakes, spiders and ants are all my noble teachers. I learn from people too. People like Buddha, Dogen, Ramana Maharshi, Thich Nhat Hanh and Mooji understand mountain wisdom too and so I learn from them.
 
And I learn from other people as well. From the media and conversations, I learn to trust my mind and opinions. I learn that some things are good and some bad. I learn pride, arrogance, disappointment, anger, judgment and fear. I learn suffering. And I learn confusion because most people do not understand mountain wisdom. And if I spend too much time listening to their thoughts and opinions or my own, I don’t either.
 
So mostly I just listen to the mountains. The mountains teach me silence and stillness. They teach a timeless wisdom affected by neither birth nor death. Do not imagine that mountains cannot speak. They are always speaking. Do not imagine that mountains are limited to this planet or that they were not here before this planet. Do not imagine that these mountains have any limitations at all. Do not imagine that there is a hair’s breadth of separation between you and these mountains, because that is not what mountains teach.
 
When you understand the wisdom of mountains, you may learn to speak the language of mountains. People being people, not many will understand you. They are still listening to their thoughts. But some will.

Is Life a Dream?

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dreamAs spiritual seekers we enjoy listening to or reading theories of awakening and enlightenment. We want to believe there is some sort of step-by-step plan we can follow and understand with our minds. That’s the way we’ve learned everything else in our life. If we’re honest with ourselves, we have to admit that it hasn’t really worked, at least not yet. But there’s always the hope that the next thing will, or perhaps it will if we’re a little more diligent in following the path we’ve already learned. At some point in this process at least a few of us will realize that it’s not working and it probably won’t.
 
This is rather disillusioning. If all these spiritual books and teachers can’t help me, what can?
 

A Much Simpler Approach

Let me suggest a much simpler approach that perhaps we’ve missed. And very likely we’ve missed it on purpose. 🙂
 
The reason that all these wonderful new spiritual theories and step-by-step practices haven’t really worked is that they’re all based on thoughts. And thoughts are not the solution. They’re the problem. Not thoughts themselves, but our belief and attachment to them.
 

The Zero Point

Let’s call freedom from all thoughts the “zero point”. It doesn’t mean there are no thoughts, but no thought is believed in, no thought is attached to. Thoughts have zero importance.
 
In spiritual terms this zero point is often called Samadhi and sometimes Sat-Chit-Ananda (Existence-Consciousness-Bliss).
 
Ramana Maharshi has said, “When the Self is realized, the world disappears.” This is an interesting comment and very true. And there is a simple explanation for it that has to do with how we perceive the world. We perceive the world through our thoughts about the world and the objects in it. Our first experience of this zero point is often the apparent disappearance of the world and all the objects in it. All objects we were previously seeing appear to have disappeared into a pure light. This may sound frightening, but it is anything but. It is Existence-Consciousness-Bliss.
 

An Experiment in Perception

Years ago I spontaneously discovered a little experiment. After years of meditation and a practice of letting go of attachment to thoughts I called “don’t know” mind, I discovered I could look at any object and, layer by layer, surrender every thought I had about it, name, form, color, function, connection, etc. When this was complete for that object, that object would at first become very blurry and then disappear completely into the background. I could no longer see it. As soon as a single thought about it reappeared it would immediately snap back into sharp focus.
 
This was fascinating to me so for a while I experimented with this with many objects in my perception. What it taught me was that I could not physically see an object as something separate from everything else without thoughts about that object. Without thoughts I could not separate an object from the background it appeared in front of. Without a thought, that object ceased to exist to my perceptions.
 
This also explains why the entire world and all objects cease to be perceivable at the zero point, Samadhi, Existence-Consciousness-Bliss. As Ramana says, “When the Self is realized, the world disappears.”
 
If you have not yet experienced this, then this will only be another thought to you. This is why all words are only useful as pointers, not Truth. Hopefully these words can point you to a little expansion, a little less attachment to and belief in words as Truth. And also a little better understanding of what your perceptions (sight, touch, sound, smell, taste, etc.) are made from, as well as a little better understanding of your thoughts and feelings and even sense of self.
 

All Matter is 99% Empty Space

Let me add here that physicists have long known that what we see as solid matter is actually 99% empty space. Hopefully this will give you even less confidence, attachment and belief in what you see and believe as reality. That is certainly what the experience of the zero point, Existence-Consciousness-Bliss, awakening or your True Self will do for you. It will leave your mind forever free of mental knowing. And this freedom is bliss. It is peace. It is unconditional love. It is True Knowing. It is Presence to what is in each moment.
 

Integration

The initial experience of this freedom from thoughts, what we call awakening, is so radically different from everything we have ever “known”, which we now realize was just a thought-based waking dream, that it takes some time for integration. Some rush this integration and too quickly develop thoughts and theories about what it is. They let their initial discomfort and unfamiliarity with being in a thought-free state of complete not knowing trigger them back into a thought-world, although now it is a “spiritual” or “awakened” thought-world. But this is still a thought-world. It is a new dream, but it is still a dream.
 
There is another option.
 
Obviously remaining fully in the zero-point / Samadhi is not going to work for functioning in this material plane. Without perceiving objects, we cannot function with them. So that is not really an option, at least not for long. We might call the practical second option a Middle Way or as I like to call it:
 

Living Awake

In Living Awake we are fully aware that our thoughts are not reality, are not Truth. They are just thoughts. In this way we live free of thoughts. We are fully aware that all our perceptions depend on these thoughts and so none of our perceptions are real. The world we perceive is an illusion, a dream depending entirely on thoughts. I understand how disorienting this will seem to those who still believe their thoughts and perceptions. What is there to trust? What is there to depend on? Nothing in the dream. But for one who has experienced the zero point, Samadhia, Existence-Consciousness-Bliss, the True Self, this is a life of complete freedom.
 

Living In The World But Not Of It

This is what it truly means to live in the world but not of it.
 
The world will always appear as a dream because of the way our brain and perceptions function. Reality can never be understood with the mind, thoughts or perceptions. When this is realized it is accepted. When this is accepted the dream no longer affects us, no longer causes any problems or suffering. Living Awake is living free.
 

Practical Applications

I understand that very few people have experienced the zero point as described above. And of the few who have few have spent enough time to fully integrate it. Of those who have not yet experienced this, there is a great deal of misunderstanding, attempted and believed mental understanding and flat out fear and resistance to letting go of the thought-world that completely.
 
Yet there are very practical applications for this understanding in every stage of consciousness and attachment.
 

True Healing

True and miraculous healing happens as soon as someone lets go of their attachment to the thoughts that create their suffering. It’s not something people are used to doing. But it is far less challenging than it might seem. I have helped many people do this with amazing results. It is only necessary to work with someone who is already free of thoughts.
 

Byron Katie

You can see how well this works in The Work of Byron Katie. Simply questioning these thoughts already gives some freedom. The more this freedom is experienced the more insight arises from direct experience about the true cause of suffering and freedom from suffering.
 

Presence and Mindfulness

As soon as anyone is free of thoughts, they are instantly fully Present. It might be said that Presence, mindfulness and being free of thoughts are the same thing.
 

Short Moments

It’s not necessary to experience full zero point. Even a short moment of freedom from thoughts is healing.
 

The Mantra

The most powerful mantra I know of is “I don’t know.” If understood and accepted fully this mantra brings instantaneous freedom. We have been carrying an enormous burden of layers of thoughts. Each year of our life we have added to this burden. We call it knowledge. The simple understanding that these are nothing but thoughts, and that thoughts are only representations of reality, not reality, can free us instantly from this burden. The freedom of this mantra “I don’t know”, fully understood and accepted, is amazing.
 
Do not worry. We don’t lose this knowledge. It doesn’t vanish. All we lose is the illusion that this knowledge is anything more than layer after layer of thoughts. In this realization and acceptance, we are free to experience the truth of life as it is without the heavy filters of thoughts that were in the way and prevented us from experiencing it. We were taught that the more knowledge we had the closer we would come to Truth. Life shows us that the opposite is true.
 

Thoughts Are Not the Problem

It doesn’t mean thoughts are not useful. They are. This is how we learn. This is how our culture was and is created. This is how we form our personal separate identity. The problem is that we believe these thoughts are more than thoughts. We believe they are reality. We believe they are Truth, just as we believe what we perceive with our eyes is reality, not a dream created with our thoughts.
 

The Dream

All spiritual seekers have heard that life is a dream. Perhaps now you are beginning to understand what that means. It’s not life that’s a dream. It’s our thoughts and perceptions of life that are a dream. It we want to truly experience the miracle of what life is, we only have to let go of our belief in and attachment to all the thoughts we have about it.

Surrender – the Key to Awakening

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surrenderToday, on three separate occasions, I heard some popular spiritual teachers speaking about surrender. There was something deeply off about it, not in alignment with spiritual Truth. That’s the reason for this post. As important as surrender is to the spiritual path, it needs some clarity.

Each of these teachers were speaking about surrender as something to avoid fully embracing. They were teaching about balance, a popular spiritual teaching today. This was in regard to students who have been abused by certain spiritual teachers. They felt that it was because they had fully surrendered to these teachers and didn’t use enough discrimination. Their advice was to seek a balance between complete surrender and personal determination.

Wisdom and Common Sense

On the surface this sounds like wisdom or even common sense. You don’t surrender your autonomy, independence, or judgment. You don’t surrender your self. There are many popular spiritual teachers who teach this. “Surrender is good, of course, but only up to a point. There has to be a balance.” You’ve probably heard this before – the balance of the Divine and the human.

It’s Safe

Of course the ego loves this. It’s safe. It’s not dangerous. It avoids the danger of dying or extinction. What appears to be wisdom, practicality and common sense, is based entirely on fear. And fear is the source of the ego, illusion and what keeps us from waking up. So what seems like wisdom to the ego is actually just another strategy to avoid waking up. Because waking up is the death and extinction of the egoic separate self. It’s not that it no longer exists. But it is no longer believed, no longer identified with, and to the ego that’s death. It’s the death of the illusion of a separate, independent self.

Some Clarity About Surrender

That I heard three different popular spiritual teachers speak about this at different times on the same day made it clear that some clarity was needed.

I’m certainly not advising anyone to surrender completely to these abusive teachers. They are also not awake. Awake beings do not act in this way. That is the ego. An awake being no longer experiences a separate personal identity. That illusion has been fully surrendered. In this way the type of desire and need that these abusive teachers exhibit cannot happen. There is only acting in the highest benefit of all, because there is no separation from all.

What We Surrender To

First, we have to understand what we surrender to. We don’t surrender to a person, whether it’s a spiritual teacher, a guru or a zen master. What we surrender to is Truth. What we surrender to is the Something More that is beyond all thoughts, concepts and beliefs, beyond all persons. This may and does appear in awake spiritual teachers. But it is not them. It is Truth expressing Itself through them. And that is what we surrender to, fully and absolutely, with no reservations, resistance or attachment. How do we know it’s Truth? This same Truth has always been in us. There is a resonance. Truth speaks to Truth.

What We Surrender

In addition to knowing what we surrender to, we also need to know what we surrender. We surrender everything. We surrender our identity as a separate self. We surrender our thoughts, knowledge and beliefs. We surrender our perceptions of the world, ourself and others. We surrender all attachments and resistance. We surrender the world and ourself. We surrender everything. Clearly this is not very popular to the ego. Many spiritual teachers have still not surrendered themselves in this way and this completely. They prefer balance. Surrendering is never going to be popular. But it is the only way we can awaken. There is no other way.

Truth Outshines Illusion

Some awakened beings have such a powerful awakening that Truth completely outshines all illusion. This can happen in a single night as it did for Eckhart Tolle and Ramana Maharshi. It’s rare, but it does happen. But this too is surrender. It just happened completely in a single day. All thoughts, concepts, beliefs, the world and the self identity were surrendered in one moment because their realization and experience of Truth was so powerful it completely dissolved all illusion.

Usually It Happens in Stages

Most of us need to do this in stages. It’s not a problem. We do this step by step, continually surrendering more. And as we do, as the surrender is deeper and more complete, we experience all the rewards that come with surrender, so we continue.

At some point, we’ve surrendered everything and Truth is revealed as always having been here. It was simply covered up by what we were afraid to surrender, by our attachment and resistance.

Fear

Fear is why we don’t surrender. The egoic self identity is based in fear. Our attachment to it and its survival is why we don’t truly awaken. We may experience moments of freedom, as many spiritual teachers have, but then the fear returns and we “play it safe.” We seek a balance between being awake and being asleep. It sounds good to the ego, but this balance is an illusion. This balance doesn’t exist. We either fully surrender the illusion or we don’t.

Spiritual teachers who have abused their students create a great deal of harm. Maybe the worst harm they have done is to increase the fear in seekers. Even these three popular spiritual teachers seem to have fallen victim to this fear. This is why they’re not awake. They’re not fully surrendered. And their advice encourages their students to also remain afraid and avoid waking up.

It’s Not Rocket Science

Awakening is not rocket science. Although to hear many teachers talk it seems to be. There are so many practices, approaches, philosophies, theories, teachings and explanations. But it’s not nearly as complicated as all that. Most of these complicated theories are simply more ways to avoid surrendering. It really comes down to surrender. We surrender the illusion to Something More, to Truth. Fear is a great obstacle. But if we’re truly determined to live in Truth, we surrender anyway. Not to a person, but to Truth. Yes, it takes some trust. This Truth cannot be seen, named, described or even imagined. Yet it is very real, infinite and unchanging. It’s the only thing that is truly reliable in this world or any other. And you CAN directly realize and experience it. Right now and always it is more intimate to you than your heartbeat. The only price of admission is your full and complete surrender. You pay everything and in return you get everything. The good news is you’re only paying with illusion, what is temporary, what cannot last. And for this you receive what is eternally True. It’s a highly beneficial exchange.

The one who doesn’t want to surrender completely is also an illusion. This is the main illusion that you surrender. It is the one seeking balance. The surrender of this is the final step before awakening to Truth. You cannot walk through the gateless gate of Truth dragging this illusion of a separate self. That has never worked.

Surrender

Surrender is essential. There is no other way. You can surrender easily, effortlessly, willingly and even joyfully. Or you can succumb to fear and resist, fight and struggle. The second approach is what most of us do. That’s why surrender and awakening seem so difficult and are so uncommon.

Satsang

In Satsang, surrender is happening too. But there is less struggle, less resistance. You’re with others who have surrendered or are in the process of surrendering. It doesn’t seem so bad. Everyone is happy and at peace. The teacher, if he or she is awake, fully surrendered, seems to be an embodiment of freedom, peace, love and joy. How bad can it be? Of course not bad at all. In fact, there is nothing more precious in all existence.

 

Freedom

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bird-cage2To erase all concepts from the mind is to see life fresh, new, alive and unlimited. The great bliss, freedom, peace and love that arise naturally and effortlessly as soon as we do this shows that it was never more than these concepts that kept us from realizing the miracle of life as it is.

We may feel that we are prisoners of our conditioned minds. But this has never been so. We’ve been sitting in a cage of our own making, but the door has always been wide open. We could always step outside at any time. How about now?

We can use spiritual practices like Self-Inquiry to free ourselves from addiction to the limiting and distorting concepts that have ruled our lives. We may have build a foundation of these limiting concepts, but that doesn’t mean they are as solid as we think. Simply questioning them reveals their fragile and insubstantial nature. When looked at clearly, they crumble.

You’ll find many practices on this website that will help you step out of this limiting conceptual prison and realize the great freedom you already have.

Spiritual Attention Deficit Disorder (SADD)

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pay-attentionWhy attention is THE single most important factor in your awakening and remaining awake.

If your attention remains focused on awake consciousness, then you remain always awake. It’s as simple as that. This is what it means to be awake. Your attention is no longer distracted by thoughts, feelings, situations and events. Although you are always aware of them and everything else that is happening, you are never pulled away from the greater reality, which is always here.

Most people, after they first become aware of their thoughts as separate from who they are, believe it is their thoughts that keep them trapped in illusion and suffering. But this is not true. It is not the thoughts themselves, but the attention focused on the thoughts that creates all this suffering. The thoughts themselves are completely harmless. Remove your attention from them and they seem to disappear into the background.

Test this out in your own life.

Retreats

This is what happens when you go on an extended spiritual retreat for a week or longer. If it is only for a week, you may spend the first few days with your attention still being distracted by your thoughts. There will be some time when your attention is focused on the deeper truth and experience of awake consciousness, but your attention is easily distracted by your thoughts, as this is your conditioned habit. After three days or so, your attention remains more and more on awake consciousness, the experience of great peace, love, oneness, happiness without cause. Finally toward the end of the retreat your attention remains mostly on awake consciousness.

And then the retreat is over. You go home. You return to your “normal” life. The distractions begin again quickly. Within a day or two the wonderful experience of profound peace, love and joy seem to fade away. All that has really happened is that your attention has been distracted and you have allowed this to happen. You allow it because you have been conditioned to do exactly this.

This profound freedom, peace, love and happiness you experienced on the retreat is actually always here. It never actually needed a retreat. It just needed you to shift your attention to what is always here. And the retreat helped you do this. It helped you focus your attention on something that is truer than all the distractions. But you’re used to focusing your attention on the distractions. You’ve been trained to keep the focus of your attention away from Truth and onto anything but Truth.

Satsang

Satsang is the same thing. Satsang is “living in truth” or “being in good company”. So during these few hours, we return our focus to what has always been here. And this feels wonderful. For some the mind is still distracting our attention. But the environment of Satsang is so focused and the energy of awake consciousness is so strong that it pulls the attention of most of us back to it even if it occasionally drifts away.

The more time we spend with our attention fully on awake consciousness, fully on presence, fully in Truth, the easier it is for us to keep our attention here.

For information about Satsang with a Living Awake Group click here: Living Awake Groups

For more information about Satsang and spiritual energy transmission: Satsang – Living in Truth

Ongoing Persistent Attention on Awake Consciousness

Eventually we learn to do this all the time in every situation. Even in the most strenuous physical exertion we can keep our attention in this spacious awareness that includes everything while still being aware of the body and its exertion. We don’t lose anything by doing this. It actually makes athletic performance far more efficient. It’s sometimes referred to as “being in the flow”. If our attention is limited to the body and thoughts about this exertion, we become overly self-conscious and have less strength, flexibility, power and stamina. Our physical activity becomes just as limited just as our attention is.

Meditation

Meditation is not so much a vehicle for awakening as it is a practice for disciplining our attention. Most of us are slaves to our attention. It controls us rather than the other way around. This means we have become slaves to our thoughts and feelings. We have very undisciplined minds. What is called Attention Deficit Disorder is far more widespread than thought. For many of us meditation may be our first experience with true mental discipline. We received some training in school to keep our minds focused on the task at hand. But as long as we’re not studying for an exam or engrossed in a movie, our thoughts are running all over the place and our attention is running right after them. Meditation is the beginning of removing the majority of our attention from our thoughts and allowing it to rest in a much broader and less limited field of attention. The more we do this, the more disciplined our minds become and the better we feel. Eventually we are no longer controlled by our thoughts at all. We realize a freedom that has always been here, but through our limited attention we were unaware of.

For more information about various meditation techniques, click here.
Basic Meditation
Effortless Meditation
Advanced Meditation – the Gap

The Value of Attention

There are times when we do want our attention to be limited to a very narrow focus, at least for a moment. If we suddenly step on a nail and it goes through our foot, the sudden pain pulls our full attention toward our foot and we do what is necessary. If a truck coming toward us suddenly veers into our lane, we immediately focus our attention on this and take the appropriate action until the danger has passed. While our attention is focused on these things, the freedom, peace, love and happiness that is always here doesn’t disappear. It’s only that our attention for a moment moves instantly to something else. This is appropriate, good and necessary. But this is a momentary movement of attention. If we keep our attention on the accident we just avoided and play it over and over in our minds, this is completely unnecessary and keeps us locked in a dream world of thoughts.

Spiritual Teachers

Some spiritual teachers exude a very powerful energetic transmission. It seems to radiate from them. Many spiritual teachers have clever and interesting things to say. But with certain teachers it doesn’t matter what they say. They can remain completely quiet. Still this powerful energy is felt and affects many people. It is helpful to be in the presence of such teachers. The force of their attention riveted on Truth pulls everyone’s attention to this same Truth in themselves.

Often when we experience such teachers, our attention remains on our True Being for a period of time, but just as in retreats, our attention is soon distracted by the many other things going on in our life, especially our thoughts.

Short Moments Repeated Often

One way to deal with this Spiritual Attention Deficit Disorder (SADD) is to repeatedly throughout the day remind ourselves of Truth, to return to this experience of expansiveness, freedom, peace, love, joy, to ignore our thoughts and simply be present to the greater awareness of what is without making any judgments or having any opinions about it. Even if we return to Truth for only a few moments before being distracted by our thoughts again, eventually the moments in Truth will grow. We are overcoming a lifetime habit of living in illusion. And this habit has been supported and reinforced by everyone we know. Don’t be hard on yourself. Every moment of Truth is a good moment. We can learn to turn our attention toward Truth in every situation. And we can learn, eventually, to keep it here. Let it begin with short moments. This is how we overcome Spiritual Attention Deficit Disorder one short step at a time.

Any time and in any way we return to moments of Truth helps us. Whether this is on retreat, in meditation, in Satsang with an awake teacher, reading spiritual books, or watching videos, every moment is helpful. The longer we remain in each moment of Truth and the more this is repeated, the more our attention shifts from illusion to Truth. Eventually illusion no longer interests us. It no longer grabs our attention and our attention remains in Truth.

This is how we wake up.

Awakening Experiences

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It’s interesting to see what the experiences of others is. And perhaps you can see what is common to all of them. Please understand that you will have your own experience. Everyone’s conditioning has this same commonality and is also completely unique. So your experience of awakening will also be unique. What is common to all these experiences as well as what you will experience is the end of ego, self-identification. But it will happen to you in your own completely unique and beautiful way, like the blooming of a flower in Springtime.